By now, we should already understand the importance of doing shadow work. It is about removing barriers along the way and is one of the most overlooked aspects of creating the life we want.
There are infinite tools and methods for doing shadow work. Consistent with Teal Village’s approach, we advocate a self-guided process—learning to fish instead of receiving fish—and seeking professional help for more difficult cases. Once the process is mastered, it can be used anytime and anywhere. This is a lifelong journey, and shadow work should become part of our lifestyle, like personal hygiene, not done only on special occasions. A short article like this cannot explain every nuance, but it offers an overview. Here, we will point the direction and introduce the basic process.
The most effective approaches are usually the simplest. Many people have heard about mindfulness practice. It is the most important practice for raising consciousness. If the intention is to take control of our lives by taking charge of our thoughts, then we need to practice mindfulness in two ways.
1. Turning Subconscious Thoughts into Conscious Thoughts
This involves evaluating subconscious thoughts as they bubble up to the surface, deciding which ones are unhealthy and should be discarded, and replacing them with healthier ones. Old and long-held thoughts or beliefs can be stubborn and resist change. The reprogramming process must be repeated until it becomes second nature, like driving a car. This requires commitment, self-love, self-acceptance, and patience.
Negative emotions such as anxiety, guilt, sadness, overwhelm, or anger, which we often want to let go of, are, in fact, our best partners in this process. Since thoughts trigger emotions, emotions can serve as breadcrumbs leading us back to the underlying thoughts that caused the fear in the first place.
Let’s illustrate this with an example. Suppose you feel nervous before making an important presentation. Pause and take a deep breath. Now, investigate what thoughts triggered the nervousness. Did you focus on what could go wrong during the presentation? Did you imagine how the audience might judge you negatively? Did you worry about not knowing how to answer a question? Were you upset because your favorite jacket is at the dry cleaners, and you won’t look your best on stage? Do any of these thoughts help you feel confident or deliver an inspiring presentation? Of course not.
What if you replaced them with thoughts like these: “I’ve done my best to prepare; I will do a great job. If something doesn’t go well, I will use it as a learning opportunity. If there are questions I can’t answer, I’ll take notes and follow up after the meeting.”
Better yet, what if you shifted your focus to the audience with thoughts like: “This presentation isn’t about me. It’s about sharing what I know with people who can benefit from my knowledge. As long as I hold a mindset of service and want the best for the audience, they will want me to succeed as much as I do.”
With such positive thoughts, would you still feel nervous? Unlikely. This is how you bring thoughts from the subconscious mind to the conscious mind and choose how to program them. You might not achieve the ideal state in one try, as negative thoughts may linger, but with practice, it will become easier.
Our entire life is made up of moments like this. The thoughts we choose to focus on create our experiences. Sometimes, we hold a thought so strongly that it becomes a belief, such as “my sister is spoiled” or “people from certain countries can’t be trusted.” To raise consciousness, we need the courage to challenge such beliefs.
A simple and highly effective method for this is Byron Katie’s Four Questions from The Work, explained in her book Loving What Is:
- Is it true? (Yes or no. If no, move to question 3.)
- Can you absolutely know that it’s true? (Yes or no.)
- How do you react, and what happens, when you believe that thought?
- Who or what would you be without that thought?
These approaches work well for thoughts at the surface of the subconscious mind. Deeper thoughts, especially those formed during childhood or even prenatal periods, require more intense self-reflection. For persistent patterns or intergenerational issues, professional help may be beneficial. With this approach, it is possible to address issues like depression or procrastination to a great extend.
As a general rule, if a thought brings joy or peace, it’s healthy. If it brings negative emotions like anxiety or guilt, it’s worth observing, reflecting on, and modifying. Think of this as detective work—anyone can become Sherlock Holmes in their inner world. With curiosity, not judgment, this process can even be fun and exciting.
2. Being in the Here and Now
On average, tens of thousands of thoughts pass through the human mind daily. Some arise from within, while others came from external sources like the internet, TV, or conversations. Many of these thoughts can drain energy or distract us from the present.
This is where meditation comes in—a highly effective way to control the mind, making it calm and unaffected by external noise. Meditation doesn’t have to mean sitting on a mat for 30 minutes. We can practice mindfulness anytime—while walking, eating, or talking—by focusing solely on the activity at hand.
Anyone who has practiced meditation extensively or attended a 10-day silent retreat, like Vipassana, which teaches equanimity, knows that happiness comes entirely from within. We already have everything we need to create the life we are meant to live. Happiness is accessible through practicing mindfulness and being in the present moment, often with immediate results.
Here’s a simple way to gauge whether you’re on the right track:
- If you feel depressed or regretful, you’re living in the past.
- If you feel anxious, you’re living in the future.
- If you feel peaceful and content, you’re living in the present.
In essence, your thoughts create your reality—so choose them wisely.
In Understanding Fear (4/4), we will discuss the most important relationships in our lives that require healing.